Monday, August 6, 2007
Not talkin' to mum for two days paid off when we finally have a personal get together on our own. As some of you read it up, I fought with Mum due to the fact that she accused me of sumthang that I did not do, and I been all big headed and didn't talk to her. When we have our long talk on the Friday night, I kept all quiet. I was standin' and swayin' side to side. Due to the fact that I am too angry and sad to even speak a word. Cause I went this lots of times , and I know where it will bring us too. I was swayin' to keep my mind relax and not to tear down. Mum was there, in front of me, confrontatin' and demanded that I speak up with what's botherin' me. She even questioned me what made me to give her a cold shoulder when I am suppose not top. All I could said was, '' Nothin'.'' I am just too tired and sick of all this junk. It frustrates the shit outta me. She should know how my attitude will be like if I were to speak it all up. Thus, to refrain from all anger and frustrations, it's best that I keep quiet and respect her when she's talkin'. Yea, by swayin' side to side that is. And on Saturday mornin', she woke me up. I totally forget bout parents seminar over in Ite Simei. I have the urge to go back to sleep and just sleep till the sun went down again in the evenin'. I was soooooooooooooooooooooooo knacker. I really am. My eyebags are obvious now. Hell, I need my beauty sleeeeeep. I do not want my eyebags to be like Nurul's. HAHAHHAHAKZ. Sorry ehk cousin, aku perli kau je. Hehhehe. However, I remembered that I owe her two days of my life, and I vow to make that Saturday an enjoyable one. Thus, I dressed up and together, hand in hand-literally, we made our way to Geylang. We stopped over in Geylang to get her cravin's for Nasi Padang been paid. However, the shop closed for that Saturday. I expected mum to be all sad and downhearted, but NO! Sumthang else caught her eyes. It was the dresses hangin'. OMG. I fall in love with the dresses instantly. Mum told me I have got my dress over in Far East last week, why don't I get it over in Geylang this time round. I nodded my head franctically. I got myself two dresses. One of which is for National Day. Red and white dress. Mum was shakin' her head when I bought that red dress. I was grinnin' away when the lady passed me the shoppin' bag. I love red dresses laaaaaaaaaaah. I really do. May be I do have my Dad's genes afterall. He love gals in dresses and he love red. Ahh, that explain my cravin's for dress and redness. And to think that I looked like mum would inherit me her genes. Not the slight thought. Well, may be the way I think would be their combine brains and produces my unpredicatable way of thinkin'. Heck, I still do have their genes in a way or so. So what's the commontion naJj ?
We made our way to Ite Simei to find that not even HALF of the Mulit Theater Hall to be filled. To think that we actually rush our away there. The talk was kinda draggy and dry. After which, we have tour around the school. I looked out for Baby Sis's favouriate course. Food and Beverages. However, it stated there that the students will be handlin' western food thus, she would have to handle pork. That turn mum off immediatly. Baby sis was of course, dissapointed and she looked very downhearted. Her dream was to enter that course and set up a restaurant of her own. She lovelovelove cookin' and she made a good cook. She has the skills and talent. When she get her hands on cookin', I would be found askin' her when she will serve the food. She do make good food and drinks of her own. She was lookin' forward to enter that course, however, that pork segment really wash her flame down. I for that matter, is the total opposite. I could not even cut an apple for God's Sake ! Yes. In fact , I am. Orang cakap buta hurufkan ? Aku cakap aku buta masak boleh tak ? Boleh lah ehk. I do not forsee myself in the kitchen in the comin' years to come. I am all bout notes and books. Call me a geek or nerd as you like. But I could never hold a knife. I would walk away when someone holds the knife and I would be standin' feets away if mum would want to turn on the stove. I am soo much afraid of knife and fires and I am sooooooooooooooooooooo not intrested in cookin'. I really do not have the passion nor the intrest. I just could not find the urge to cook like how I have the urge to read Risin' Tide. May be, I am still a teenager who longs for enjoyment and knowledge. I am not a girl, not yet a woman says it all.
After the seminar, we headed down to Cik Apah's house. Mum was runnin' late for her afternoon prayers, we flag a cab and rushed our way down. In the midst of everythang, someone saw me over in ITE Simei and he does not have the urge to apporoach me. He said that I looked rushed and he was kinda far away from where I was. Kazu, next time just shout for me okies ? Heh. We catch up with Cik Apah's family. I, for one, get personal with Akak Nadia. She has now turned to be a beautiful young lady. When I say beautiful, I really mean it. People over in Arab Street have actually asked her to model for their new outfits when she was just doin' her simple shoppin' with my aunty, and her current workin' place it was the boss that took care of her. Her Japanese boss would send and fetch her after work. Angmohs request in takin' pictures with her due to the fact that she is simply.. beautiful. I am so proud to have such a beautiful and polite cousin. She is a lady with poise and elegance. I adore you Akak Nadia.
We headed back to Geylang as we wanted to get Baby Sis her second dress. You see, baby sis is one heck of a fussy lady. She does not like clothes of certain cuttin' , even colours she would be fussy bout. She is soo meticulous when it comes to dress up. As for me, when I saw beautiful outfit, I would get it right then and there. If it's too revealin' I would do all means to cover my assest up. Wore a tube inside or simply have a cardigen on. After gettin' baby sis dress, we made our way to a weddin' dinner. I was too full by then. I grabbed couple of the dishes and sat quietly. The weddin' dias was not a blown away kinda decorations. It was pretty normal and simple. But the pair look fanastic together. We headed home and rest our feet for yesterday's big day.
One of my oldest frens and neighbour got hitched yesterday. He was frantically excited and happy. He was smilin' and greetin' everyone along his way. He looked at me and gave that big smile. I was soooooo happy for him. He deserve his princess, really. His princess looked sizzin' sexy and sassy. She was all smile and her deep dimple revealed. I went awwwwwwwww when both of 'em held hands. I tear when the neighbour hugged his mum tighted, I smiled when both his sisters held him tight, I grinned when both of the men, father and son came together and gave each other a big and warm hug. It was such a scene. I teared I tell you. The family cried tears of happiness. It was such a memorial day for all of 'em.
I was the Kendarat for that day due to the fact that they were shorthanded. And heck, never did I felt so angry whilst doin' my work. You see, I was incharge of a big section of people while the cousins incharge of another. It does not bother me if they wanna grabbed their lunch , all I know is, they have to do their part of the job so that I would not runnin' around with the basket filled with cupcakes. The first half of the day went fine and fun, with baby sis helpin' me out, my work load was lessen. However, I found out that there were huge number of people who did not receieved their cupcakes. I would appologize if it was from my side of the job, however, it was the cousin's side ! Heck, I was frustrated cause the aunts was all lookin' over and starin'. I personally when over to the TUDUNG lady and asked if she could carry on helpin' me out due to the fact that the guests are mulitpyin' in a huge number as the moment passes by. And all she could said was '' TAK NAK'' which means, '' Don't want.'' I WAS DAMNED ANGRY. Heck, of course I was. I was tired due to the lack of rest all this week and I have my papers the next day. ( Which happen to be today lah kan ? ) All along was kept quiet due to the fact that I was thinkin' and memorisin' the facts for my Geography papers. I am not in no blood related and there you are, when you jolly well know that YOUR AUNTS AND UNCLES are short handed, and you said, DON'T WANT ?! Coddin' me aye ? I went over to my mum and I spout all frustrations. The aunts looked over and some were askin' if I have done my side. I slammed the basket down and I folded my arms. Mum did the job for a while and she came over and she too was frustrated. Why ? Cause mum was the only one doin' the job when that TUDUNG gal sitin' and laughin' and eatin' when it was her JOB to do help out.
''Sial, pakai tudung tutup otak atau aurat sak ? Bodoh.'' Was what I said. She looked at my with guilt and I gave her the fuck off and do your work lah bodoh. She still does not get the idea. HECK!! Betulnyer bodoh sak ni. I was all tired and worn out and I have my papers to worry about and that happened to an impatient and no tolerance people, like ME!. Heck, just my day. And the damned annoyin' thang was, her aunts look over to me as though I did not do my work !! You know that kinda stare when someone gave to you when you did not do your task ? I told mum and mum asked me to relax and just carried my task as per normal. I did as was told. Yesterday's kendarats really sucks balls lah. Now, that taught me a lesson, even minah tudung who are supposed to be all good and smart are not at all. Sorry if I sterotype, but I came across many minah tudung who are just simply coverin' their assest just for the sake of coverin' it all up. They do not have the slightest idea on why they do that and how they should behave.
My ex even saw minah tudung dancin' in a club with beer bottle in her hand, my fren opened up her tudung right in front of MOS , my old used to be fren smoke with her tudung on, my cousin who actually wore tudung bad mouth my mum behind our backs , frens who wore tudung and said '' FUCK YOU '' and '' PUKIMAK kau'' loudly in the public , neighbours who are mathers and wore tudung , gossip and bad mouthin' other childern like there's no neraka jahanam. And pardon me, they are not my age , they are older and some could be married off now. See, how can I not sterotype ? What does this stupid morons ladies thinkin' about ? Heck, I would rather be friendin' someone who curse and swear, and wore tubes and miniskirts, who takes drugs, who strips in the middle of the hotel corridor, who drink to their heart content. They are better off then those just pretendin' pious ladies that have no slightest lesson on how to behave when they show the public that they are MUSLIMAH. Apa nak jadi dengan dunia ? Betul Ustazah dan Ustaz cakap, dunia memang dah nak kiamat.
Ya allah, kaulah Maha Besar, lindungilah mereka yang sesat dan berikanlah mereka hidayahMU. Peliharalah imanku dan iman keluargaku. Amin.
Tell me when the earth stop revolvin' and when that day comes, I wanna be prepared enough to face ALLAH. I wanna to prepared enough to face Judgement Day. I wanna cross my mum's hair towards heaven with ease. I wanna drink milk from the river, I wanna be at my most beautiful and meet my parents after we been judged. I do not wanna be caned with long flames ropes. I don't wanna be swimmin' with blood. I do not wanna suffer a day cause a day in hell is the same as thousand of years. I do not wanna suffer, I wanna have peace and happiness. And hopefully , my doa will be heard, and hopefully I would change myself and be a better one. I know, I am workin' towards that. I have a long way to go.
... en route to be
